As children we are told not to judge others. “Don’t judge a book by its cover,” it’s rude to stare judgmentally at someone even if they look out of place, first impressions are often wrong and all that. Some take these lessons to heart and others don’t, sucking others into a whirlpool of gossip under the guise of “sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me.”

Yet there is another kind of judgment we do not warn people about, a judgment that becomes clear when you are in high school: the judgment of others based on their goals in life or path through which to achieve these goals.

I’ve had quite enough of shaming people for going to state schools, or joining the army, or going to a trade school. I’ve had enough with sideways glances at those who choose community colleges, or don’t get quite as many scholarships, or would rather be a beautician than a scientist. I hate having to hear terse replies to condescending questions asked of future English and art majors. Why do we judge people for life decisions that have no effect on us?

High school does seem to glorify one path: take as many AP classes as you can, get a near perfect on the SAT and apply to prestigious schools who will offer you scholarships and status to parade around the weeks before graduation. I understand that for many this is the dream, but it is by no means the only path or the best path for some.

The question is really what defines a successful life. Is success impressing people or is it making yourself the happiest you can be? There is an insidious emphasis on success measured on your paycheck, or the creamy white paper of your diploma.
We should teach kids that if someone’s happy and they aren’t hurting anyone else, leave them alone. Their choice of school or profession or lifestyle has no bearing on you. Don’t shame me for my dreams, it isn’t going to change them anyway.